For Me? You Shouldn't Have...

But I'll take it!

Last Saturday, like several Saturdays in the future (wink), I was surrounded by ladies. They call it a 'baby shower', but I didn't feel any cleaner afterwards. In fact, there were a lot of people trying to put their hand on mom's tummy, which just happens to be my current home, thank you very much. I have a feeling if they could've gotten to my cheeks, there would've been some pinching. But I'm not complaining...there was free food.

And the presents...oh, the presents. All for little ol' me. It's a little embarrassing: I mean, I'm just a product of an ancient reproduction process. I am adorable, of course, but it's a bad precedent to shower (oh, that's where it comes from) a person with gifts for just existing before he even enters your world. Don't you think? The poor dog never gets anything and he's been around longer than me. Oh, I've been handed a note from the Tall Man: the dog never gets anything because he destroys anything he comes into contact with. He also says getting things for free is a perk of being a Fox, so I should get used to it.

Now, I'm just a baby, so I don't know what all the gizmos and gadgets that I got are supposed to do. But, there's a lot of toys, along with a lot of things with Foxes, Cardinals and Missouri Tigers on them. M-I-Z! And, that's just what I can see out of mom's viewfinder. I included a picture of it from my point of view. Enjoy! Because I still have T-minus 7 weeks (?!) before I can enjoy it.

I've got to come out where?

Wake up people! Big Brother is watching us...and I'm not talking about the dog. Whenever I'm ready to come into your world, all kinds of people are going to be up in my business.

The Fox family, (me included since I'm nestled in mom's tummy) sat in on a 'class' about how my 'birth' is going to go down. Down is the operative word in that sentence. Have you heard how I enter the world? Thank God I am not a girl. I don't have to watch those videos again until I have a baby myself, which is never going to happen because girls are gross.

At least I could flip around and skip the gross parts. The tall man got pretty queasy seeing the first video of a birth. Luckily, by the fourth (or fifth, or hundredth), he was numb to the miracle of life.

On the plus side, I did see the cushy place where I'm going to be staying once I'm out. It's called Postpartum, but to me it looks like the Ritz Carlton, whatever that is. I've included a picture from Boone Hospital's website along with a link to their baby section. It's a good site.

Suites

Imagine being able to experience the birth of your baby in the intimacy of home-like surroundings, and then relaxing with family and friends in the comfort of your own family room! The Boone Family Birthplace at Boone Hospital has been designed to provide you with the best possible environment in which to become acquainted with your new arrival.

This is Madness!

With the help of the tall man, I have filled out my first NCAA bracket. He gave me a lot of advice like: pick a team you think not many other people will have in the final four, don't go too heavy on early upsets and go with your gut. Mom was helpful too. She explained which teams had the better uniforms, what the names of the teams were, their mascots and most importantly, what basketball is. The dog didn't help at all, he tried to eat my bracket. I'll note that for later as it seems a good excuse if I'm running behind on my homework.

I was hooked on the NCAA tourney from the opening tip. There was the dizzying high of watching a team I picked (Notre Dame) win a close one in the first game. Then the diaper-filling low of watching my Elite Eight (Elite Eight!) Iowa St. Cyclones lose to UAB. The Tall Man says never trust a team with initials and now I know why. Besides, it could be worse: I heard the Tall Man say he had ISU in his Final Four while his less tall friend had Iowa State winning it all! I will say, if more of my final four teams lose, I'll have to join him in hitting the bottle...and by bottle I mean the amniotic sac that surrounds me - that's the only thing I can hit right now.

Read 'em and weep...not bad for a fetus

Moves Make the Man

So, the tall man has been trying desperately to feel me wiggling around in here, so I decided to give him a show. I've proven to be quite the exhibitionist. When it was revealed that I was a boy, I pretended to be shy for about 3 seconds before I did a barrel roll and spread eagle right in front of the camera. I felt like a Kardashian (Hey oh!).

Well, the barrel roll must be my move...mom decided to let the tall man feel her stomach for several minutes so his lame attempts to catch me in the act could be rewarded. Once again, I waited for about 3 seconds and did a 180-degree turn that I made sure he could feel. He then preceded to sprain his shoulder high-fiving himself as if he had some sort of control over it. When he put his hand there again, I completed the full turn for good measure. Mom said it was most aggressive move I've made so far and she's probably right. I guess I just perform best when the lights are brightest. Which, in this case, is a figure of speech because his giant man-hands blocked out what little light I get in here.

Since I haven't been able to procure a camera in here yet, I don't have any pictures of my move, but below is an artists' rendering:

Burrowing For the Winter

First of all, mom went to the doctor today and all appears to be well with my development, so that's awesome. I'm really getting my sea-legs. I've done several laps around pool usually after mom eats so I work off the nutrients I'm being given. I'm told moving around the womb is great for your abs and your quads...whatever those are. As active as I am, though, the large man still can't feel me kick/move at all. I can't help but laugh because I can hear him bumbling around outside. Soon enough, dude, soon enough.

Secondly, this Blog really gets results. Remember how I told you my parents were being lazy when it came to my outside home? Well, I must've lit a fire because all of sudden: we have a crib and changing table! Not only that, but the clutter is gone. There are a few photos included. Shout out to my cousins Will and Max for parting with their goodies. Now, if we can just get some sweet decorations in there. Anything but letters - they what? Why would they do that when I clearly can't read?

Parents just don't understand. 

Changing Table

                                                               

Crib